I take it you use one of those cheap little umbrellas that have an average lifespan of one month?
It is one of the ones that fold up... Seeing as we have been getting so much rain lately, I think it might be time to invest in a good one. ... I want a really one that could double as a cane so I could pretend to be a snazzy Victorian gentleman. ;)

Time for a hot toddy. ;)
You know, you're the second person who suggested that. *laughs*